About Uploads + Update/Venting

For those who might be wondering after seeing me upload an image: No, I haven't gotten my own place or a new PC yet.  I just remembered that I had my art folder backed up on Kef's PC, and he put some of the smaller folders from within it into Dropbox so I could download them to a flash drive on one of the library PCs.  I knew I had finished images sitting in the folder and I just wanted to be able to post some, as there are some days where I just don't have anything better to do...

See, thing is, being homeless is both ridiculously stressful and horrendously boring.  I'm doing what I can at the moment to fix my situation, but a lot of it is just waiting.  I'm no longer looking for a job, as my mental health just won't allow it right now--the meds I was on before ended up not working.  It seems the reason I felt better was because they pushed me into a hypomanic episode, and that was followed by another bout of depression that landed me in yet another crisis center.  They switched my meds at this other crisis center, but they only put me on antidepressants at first because they wanted to make sure there were no adverse effects before adding other meds.  And since I only stayed in the crisis center for a few days before being discharged, I have to find a psychiatrist to evaluate me and provide further medication.  The antidepressants help a little (mostly by keeping the suicidal thoughts at bay), but it's highly likely I need mood stabilizers too--I have horrific mood swings, plus the depression is still there.  I'll probably also need something for my anxiety, especially since I'm having panic attacks every other day.  Which is why I stopped trying to look for a job--it was just too stressful, and my case manager at the shelter has told me that normally she pushes people to look for work but in my case I can't work in this condition and just need to focus on my mental health.

So, back to the whole waiting thing.  Like I said, I need a psychiatrist, but there's a waiting list for that.  My case manager helped me fill out an application for housing, which I then dropped off at the housing office, but now I have to wait to hear back from them.  She also had me apply for different benefits...which is even more waiting to hear from people.  The social worker I've been seeing has been helping me look for doctors and did manage to get me an appointment somewhere, so now I have to wait for my appointment date.  And there's other benefits I've applied for but can't finish the application process until a doctor fills out some paperwork for me, so I'm waiting for that too.  Every day when I leave the shelter I have to wait for things to open (we have to leave before 7:45am and almost nothing opens until 9am or later, including the support group I go to).  At the end of each day I have to go wait in front of the shelter for them to take me inside (and on Sundays almost everything is closed so most of the day is spent just waiting to go back into the shelter).  Once in the shelter I have to wait for dinner, wait around for other people to smoke during their smoke breaks (we all have to be supervised, so I usually have to go out back with everyone else even though I don't smoke), wait to do my laundry, wait to shower, wait to go to bed...

I'm just really sick of spending so much time waiting.  Sorry for the long paragraph of complaining, I've just been needing to vent.

The good news is, despite the massive amount of waiting, I've been getting done what I need to get done.  My case manager has assured me that I'm doing everything right and in time things will work out, so here's hoping.  In the meantime, I'll be posting things now and again, rather than let these finished pictures just sit around.